Monday, February 16, 2009

Oh, the horror

Hallelujah, there's finally cycling to watch on TV. Don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't love the 19 hours a day of bull riding coverage that Versus seems to carry, it's just that a change would be nice every once in a while. So today, I'd like to throw out a few observations that I made whilst watching coverage of the Tour of California.

* A few more commercials would really be nice.

* I'm really glad that I tuned in early to catch the 2 full hours of "coverage". If you watched the preview show last weekend, you pretty much saw the first hour of the "live coverage".

* After an hour and fifteen minutes of "coverage", we actually get to see some cycling.

* My excitement over getting to watch actual cycling, is quickly tempered by the fact that it's a time trial. When I posted a few weeks ago that there was nothing more boring than watching a flat stage of a pro cycling race, I might have been mistaken. I had forgotten how mind numbingly boring an individual time trial can be to watch.

* I'm guessing that while Lance was spending the last couple of years training and riding is bike, Floyd Landis was busy spending every penny he had every earned trying to appeal his suspension and not riding his bike. Ivan Basso must have just spent the last couple of years eating pasta. While Lance came in at 10th, Basso and Landis came in 66th & 90th respectively.

* The more I watch Levi Leipheimer race, the more I like him. Did anyone else notice him in the start house? He was so geek'd up for the prologue, his eyes were about the size of silver dollars, and his arms were literally trembling.

* If you didn't stick around to watch the awards presentation, it seemed to be complete chaos up there on the podium. Govanator Schwarzenegger seemed to be just wandering around aimlessly, with no one telling him were to go or what to do. Finally, a podium girl grabbed him by the arm, and told him were to stand. Then, when the prologue winner Fabian Cancellara came out, he first went right up on the podium. The same podium girl, who had just finished manhandling the Governor, told him to get the hell down from there and stand in front of the podium. They then had some guy come out to put the yellow jersey on Cancellara, and he acted like his mother has been dressing him for the last 50 years. He seemed completely befuddled by how a zipper is supposed to work. Cancellara wound up putting the jersey on himself. I think Arnold was ready to declare the podium a state disaster area, and apply for federal funds.

Stage 1
* Apparently, Fabian Cancellara was so put off by having to put on his own yellow jersey the day before, that he decided to take his toys and go home.

* Can someone please explain to me how California got the reputation for having great weather. Apparently, it's 78 degrees and blue skies every day of the year, except for the week that they decide to have the ToC. The only thing missing was a plague of locust. And another thing. We can get pictures of Jupiter, millions of miles away in space, but we can't get pictures from California if it's raining. Ain't technology great.

* As much as I enjoy watching Bob Roll in the studio, he's absolutely a train wreck out with a microphone doing actual interviews. It's almost as if English wasn't his mother tongue. But as painful as Roll has been, he's still easier to listen too than trying to listen to Frankie Andreu ramble on with his coverage on the Tour of California live website. I though my ears were going to start bleeding today.

* I noticed during the interview that they did with Lance that he was wearing a visor on his helmet. Even the great Lance Armstrong can't pull this look off without looking like he just got off of the "short bus". Just say no to visors.

* That reminds me. I recently came into possession of some very nice Trek bicycles, complete with the Astana paint scheme, that I'm looking to sell. One is actually a tricked out time trial bike. Any interested parties should post a comment on this blog.

* Is it just me, or do those Enzyte commercials make anyone else uncomfortable. Apparently, by taking these "natural male enhancements", you'll be able to attract women by the truck load. But, based on the women they have in the commercials, no one that you'd actually want to sleep with.

* Landis speaks!!! Floyd Landis actually gave an interview. Unfortunately, he looked as uncomfortable answering the questions, as Bob Roll looked asking them.

* Just like last night, after watching an hour of commercials, we finally get live pictures of today's race. After watching Mancebo ride off the front by himself for 45 seconds, of course, we have to break for some more commercials.

* HD TV is the greatest invention of our time. I never noticed how many sun spots Phil Liggett has on his head.

* I almost want to tune into the bull riding that Versus has coming on after the stage is over, just to see if they pack in as many commercial there as they do into cycling. Almost.

* Fransesco Mancebo wins the stage. I think we can all look forward to a new kit from Rock Racing to commemorate the occasion. I'll need to check and see if I have $2500.00 laying around for a new jersey and bib.

As I write this, stage 2 is being recorded via the miracle of Tivo. You can look forward to more inane remarks like these in post to come.

Peace out.....Nearly Famous Fred


Cliff said...

Who is that Ditzy chick that they have doing "the novice point of view"?

Did she really ask one of the riders what race his girlfriend is?

Oh lord, I hope she doesn't make it to France.

Donna said...

OMG! I noticed Bob Roll's 'tude towards Landis as well. I thought he wanted to "doink" Landis the eyes. It was really uncomfortable to watch.

I can't stand the guy with Sherwin and Liggett; didn't like him at the TdF last year, and he still hasn't improved. I swear I've seen Sherwin roll his eyes a time or two at him! :)